This week, we asked our readers and members about their first experience of the Sacrament of Reconciliation. Some of you recounted the fear you had of Confession as a child; others were well into their adulthood with decades of life to reflect upon. But despite all the awkwardness, embarrassment, and nervousness you related, all of you expressed how overwhelmingly grateful you were for God’s mercy in this special sacrament. Here’s a sampling of your responses:
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“I remember the night before. I was 30 years old, sitting in my room trying to memorize the Act of Contrition while my wife watched (Law and Order) SVU. I thought the prayer was beautiful, and wanted to know it. I looked at my wife and said I was going to pray it out loud, to see if I missed anything. Right as I started praying it, the detective on TV knelt down and prayed the words at the same time. It was written into the episode, because he was investigating a minister. My wife and I just looked at each other. What are the odds?”
Mike, via Facebook
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“My first confession was about a week before I entered the Church. I was 39 years old and had a huge list, and I was dreading the embarrassment of confessing many things I was particularly ashamed of. Plus, I couldn’t make the usual Confession time so I had to make an appointment with the priest… no option for anonymity! During the absolution and afterwards it was like a wind blew through me and I felt the love and mercy of God really strongly. I absolutely dreaded it going in, and I still always dread it a bit when I go about once a month now, but I can really feel God using the sacrament to heal me and guide me and unite me to him. I never knew how much I was missing out on and I’m so grateful now for how Jesus reaches out to us through his priests in Confession.”
Jessa, CHNetwork Blog
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“A lot of confusion? I vaguely remember almost vomiting out my life’s story, at least the mortal sin parts of it, and finishing rather breathlessly. I wasn’t afraid at all, and it was so good to just get it all off my plate. At the end, Father said, ‘My word. Well you’ve done VERY well indeed for a first confession.’ LOL! I hadn’t realized that he would be handing out compliments in the confessional. It was so good to confess to someone face to face, in persona Christi. I don’t mind going to confession at all now.”
Jennie Fraser, CHNetwork Community Forum Moderator
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“My first Confession was 4 years ago in RCIA. I am a former Protestant minister of 20 years, and I wasn’t used to confessing my sins in this way. I was scared to death, shaking and could barely talk. The priest conducting confessions for my class was very patient and helped me through it. Afterwards I felt more relieved and I felt like a heavy weight had been lifted from around my neck. Never in my entire life have I ever felt so at peace as when I heard, ‘Your sins are forgiven.’ I never heard that in the Protestant church. It made a big difference to hear it rather than just assuming they are forgiven, as in the Protestant church I came from. The Catholic Church has totally changed my life. I have found true peace.”
Joshua, via Facebook
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“My first confession was a disaster. One priest hearing the confessions of more than 90 children lined up alphabetically so Sister could check us off the list as we went…
It did get better over time. My best and more memorable confession was quite some time ago now, but after a 22 year absence from this beautiful gift from God. I knew peace and joy and love in that moment of forgiveness. I have experienced the same many times since then.”
Kathy, via Facebook
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“I was a little shaky as I had been a pastor for many years, and always just confessed to the Lord directly. The priest who heard my first confession was gentle, understanding and really just invited me to confess mortal sins which he explained in a categorial manner- a lot in over fifty years. The absolution seemed to have a deep cleansing effect and gave me a spiritual new start. I still find the Sacrament of Reconcilliation a very precious and holy gift on my spiritual journey.”
David, CHNetwork Community Forum
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What about you? What do you remember about your first Confession? Or, if you’re preparing for one, what questions do you have about how to approach the sacrament? Please share in the comments, and be sure to check out our Forum for more great conversations and community support from our members!
I converted back before my wedding in 1999 after being raised and confirmed as a Dutch Reformed Protestant. I don’t remember that first confession very well, but I can share what I feel every time I go to confession now.
To be honest, as I wait in line to see my Lord, I am incredibly nervous. Do I remember every sin I’ve committed? Are some of these no mortal sin? Am I being scrupulous? Am I trying to rationalize some of my sins?
Then, from the depths of my mind comes this: “Why the heck do I have to do this?? Doesn’t God already know all this? Can’t I just say I’m sorry to Him right now and go on my merry way?” This is, I think, the part of me that remains stubbornly Protestant despite all my best efforts.
Then I get in there and I start talking. It usually all comes out in a rush (I tend to blab a little, in case you haven’t guessed so far 🙂 ). Sometimes there are tears, sometimes not. Sometimes the advice Father gives is good. Sometimes it’s meh. Most of the time, the penance is light.
But then He says those words: “And I absolve you from your sins in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.”
Suddenly, my mind is at peace, my heart is lighter, and I’m filled with anticipation because I can receive the Eucharist. I can face the world again, renewed and reborn.
Confession: It’s Way Cheaper Than Therapy.
I made my apparent 1st confession many times: bless me Father, this is my 1st confession was my opening statement many times(even 2nd graders make mistakes) and after several months Father finally said–this isn’t really your 1st confession is it?? The light bulb went on, and properly humbled at my mistake I admitted: yes Father, I have been here before! I still get to(the confessional) after almost 60 years………..not sure it gets any easier 🙂 But us catholic elementary students(taught by our beloved nuns) knew how to memorize(i.e. Baltimore Catechism)
I can’t remember whether I was in 1st or 2nd grade. After absolution, the priest gave me a hug and said that I didn’t sound like such a bad guy.
I was seven or eight. I remember standing in line with other kids. I remember being nervous. That’s all I remember…LOL
I remember little about 2nd grade in general and confession and first communion in particular. I do remember that as a class we were invested in the brown scapular just before lining up for confession, and that ceremony for some reason had more impact, I do remember, when we were taken over as a class every Friday afternoon throughout Catholic grade school years for confession, wishing I had something dramatic to share feeling sorry for the priest bored with, “disobeyed 4 times, stole a quarter once, lied 3 times, smacked my brother, a lot”. About first communion in my class of nearly 200 baby boomers in 1957, I only remember I was one of only 3 girls that had black patent leather shoes instead of white, but at least was not one of those who had to wear their school shoes, What is it with girls and shoes.
I was 53 years old – had been a Christian since age 27 and now a Catholic. I was terrified. There were six of us in RCIA – five members of my family.
When I left, I wanted to *run* to my Protestant (Reformed) friends and shake them and tell them that they didn’t know what they were missing! That was 21 years ago. I now go to Confession almost every Saturday. I believe the graces from Confession are what have helped me to overcome deeply-ingrained sins.
I was seven and I remember being very upset because after I confessed my sins, the priest (who could not see me) said, “My son.” My son???? What? I am not even sure I remembered what the penance was I was so upset that he thought I was a boy. 🙂
I left the Church, unconfirmed) at the age of 15 and was brought back when I was 51. Nine years ago) I made a general confession before I was confirmed and it was the most glorious time of my life. I go bi-weekly now and every time I go in almost in tears, sometimes in tears and I come out smiling or sometimes in tears because I can’t believe the Lord loves me so very much as to keep forgiving me.