Childhood
My journey of faith is long, starting as a Catholic, then becoming Southern Baptist, followed by non-denominational, Pentecostal, Charismatic Evangelical, then briefly Greek Orthodox, and finally back to the Catholic Church.
I was baptized Catholic as an infant in Louisiana. My parents divorced when I was a year or two old, and my Catholic father immediately remarried. My mother would take me to her Baptist church as my father wasn’t really into church. Like many Protestants, she considered Catholics to be idolaters and not Christian. Nevertheless, I did attend catechism classes and received my First Communion, while also spending some Sundays at the Baptist church and Sunday school. Later, my mother remarried an Air Force fighter pilot and they got transferred to Las Vegas, NV. I spent my summers visiting them as a child and attending their Baptist church.
Teens
During my teen years, in the mid-1990s, I moved in with my mother and stepfather and became Southern Baptist by default. We lived in many places around the world, and while we were in Germany, I attended our congregation’s Baptist high school. It was during this time that I began to experience a deep hunger for God and the things of God. I began to discern a call to ministry and spent many hours praying, studying the Bible, and attending church weekly. In addition, I was very active in the youth group and church activities.
Later, back in Las Vegas, I attended a Christian high school for my junior year. This school was Pentecostal, and the church’s style was different. I continued to attend our accustomed Baptist church on Sundays, as well as remaining active in the youth group there.
At that time, I wasn’t sure whether I wanted to be a pastor or a missionary, which seminary or Bible college I should study in, or which denomination I should be affiliated with. My dream at age 13 had been to be a missionary in Africa, but the reality of growing up affects our dreams. After a senior year of much prayer, I felt led to join the military — another dream of mine. So maybe I would do my ministry within the military and use that as my mission field and springboard into a church career.
Military Ministry
In 1998, I enlisted in the Army as an infantryman and, as I grew closer to God and stronger in my faith, I began to use the military as my mission field. My first duty was in Germany, and I joined a Pentecostal style, non-denominational church there. It was in the process of being planted by a missionary pastor, and I arranged to live with him to avoid some issues associated with barracks life: first, the ungodly way of life that held sway there: second, I had been physically attacked one night in the barracks over my faith. I sought a peaceful Christian atmosphere, where I could grow spiritually and prepare for the ministry. And what better place for that than to live with this pastor, who could mold, mentor, and help me daily to become a pastor myself? I also did street evangelizing and acted as a deacon and was a drummer with the church musicians. Except for when I was on duty at the army base, I was in the church environment day and night. After a year and a half, I returned to Fort Drum, New York and joined the same denomination that I was with in Germany.
Upstate New York
In New York, I again stayed with the pastor and did all the same work. I also began to preach and help the pastor more directly, while the congregation grew from a house church to having its own huge church building. About a year later, the September 11 attacks on the World Trade Center and the Pentagon took place. Since I was in the elite 10th MTN DIV at the time, we were immediately deployed overseas, the first “boots on the ground” in the War on Terror. I fought in the famous Operation Anaconda as a Light Infantryman and worked alongside the Special Forces there.
After this tour of combat, I returned home changed for the worse, drifting away from God, backsliding at church, and associating with godless people. Also, there were some issues in my church and other, more personal problems, and I left that congregation. By God’s grace, however, I was only immersed in the party lifestyle for a few months. God helped me get my life back together, reminding me of my calling, and I soon joined another Pentecostal, non-denominational congregation, which gave me a fresh start.
Again on fire for the Lord, I joined everything I could at the new church — auxiliaries, groups, you name it — and was more involved than ever. I was the pastor’s aide, a deacon, a drummer, singing in two different choirs, and vice president of the men’s ministry. On occasion, I also preached or taught a Bible study.
A year or so later, I was again transferred, this time to Virginia. Ironically, I now lived in the same town as the head bishop of my New York denomination. So I attended there and quickly became involved once more. The bishop took notice of me and of my calling. We had many talks, meetings and prayed together. He had me going through preparation to become a minister. I took the written and oral tests, went before the church board, did a trial sermon, and ended up a licensed minister. But then I was transferred to Korea!
Korea
In early 2004, I found myself in South Korea, where I was soon installed as a minister on the ministerial staff at the Base Chapel. Soon afterwards, I became the assistant pastor of the Gospel Service there. I also helped out at a Korean Baptist church off base as their youth pastor/Sunday school teacher, working through an interpreter since I didn’t speak Korean. God’s blessing was on everything I did in those days. The small service on base quickly grew into a large crowd of fervent Christians.
Before arriving in Korea, I had transferred out of the infantry and was now a sergeant working as a helicopter maintenance supervisor with the aviation squadron on base. Toward the end of my tour, the head pastor had to leave, and I was made head pastor, leading the church during my final months there and leaving as a fully ordained minister.
Return to Afghanistan
Back in the US, it was early 2005, and I was helping a pastor friend of mine with his church. The congregation met at a Ramada Inn, and I was his assistant pastor. A year later, I returned to Afghanistan, this time
as a helicopter flight crewman and maintenance supervisor. Then, in January 2006, another stint in Afghanistan, this time for 13 months. I joined the on-base ministerial staff, and as providence would have it, I was again
selected to be the assistant pastor, even though I was by far the youngest and lowest ranking person on the ministerial staff. This seemed to confirm my calling, especially since I was elevated to senior pastor of that congregation within a few months of serving as the assistant pastor.
We were on a NATO base, so we had troops from several different nations from every continent. My ministry there was a glorious time of fellowship and worship. The services quickly attracted several hundred weekly. We had praise dance teams, choirs, musicians, and amazing preaching. I led prayer meetings, taught weekly Bible studies, was in the choir, and played the drums as needed. Many were led to Christ through us, and the chaplains began to wonder what was going on, since so many were abandoning their services to attend ours. The chaplains ended up attending with us, too. The head chaplain gave me the keys to his office, with full access to the chapel anytime I wanted.
Full Time Ministry
Upon returning home in February 2007, I left the military to pursue my passion for ministry. I had finally finished a degree in ministry while in the military, and my head bishop had heard about all the things God had done overseas. He offered me a position as head bishop working with him. It seemed that my life- long dream was coming true! I announced my departure to my congregation back in New York and went through the process of leaving the military. By July 2007, I was ready to enter the next chapter of my life. My only concern was that I had dreamed of becoming a missionary, not a leader or a bishop. This bishop knew of my passion for mission, since we had discussed it often. But the bishop was old and wanted to retire. So he needed me, and after much prayer, I acceded to his request. It seemed to be where God wanted me at this moment.
However, once I had begun, it quickly became clear that nothing was as expected, and I had made a huge mistake. It was a rough time for me, and even though I did a crusade in Africa and some seminars stateside, after a few months, the church broke apart, and it all ended badly. I ended up bankrupt and homeless, no job and nowhere to go.
Return to Las Vegas
In early 2008, I decided to head out to Las Vegas for a fresh start. Working part time and saving just enough to make the trip, I went to start a new mission. Las Vegas was my home as a teenager, so the return was nostalgic. As I began, I met a woman evangelist there, and we combined our efforts into a single ministry. Ultimately, we got married and worked with youth and the poor, providing Bible studies, a radio ministry, internet ministry, and street preaching. We ran this ministry as head pastors and founders for several years, planning future overseas missions and evangelization. But we struggled financially. We didn’t believe in asking for money, so we just continued on faith, and God always seemed to provide, but not nearly as generously as we wanted. So after several years, I joined the Air Force Reserve, working as a Special Operations Intelligence Analyst, at first part time, then full time. The pay and the working conditions were much better than my former security officer job, and I put my heart into it. But between the job and the ministry, plus studying for another degree, we were stressed out, our marriage was doing poorly, and we had to reduce the ministry to a bare minimum. Then, after a few years, the military ordered us to Florida. Pack and move again!
The Real Journey Begins
It was during this troubled time that I stumbled upon the greatest jewel of my life. I had always wanted more of God and had looked for His authentic Church. I wondered why there were so many denominations and why their doctrines and practices differed so widely. I just wanted to be part of a universal, undivided body, the way it ought to be if there is one God, one Savior, and one true divine revelation.
Leaving Nevada for Florida, I was frustrated, upset, and dissatisfied with “church” and the status quo. In those last few years before moving, I went so far as to blame Christianity itself and the “gospel” the churches today were
preaching. I knew that something wasn’t right, that somehow there had to be more, something deeper, ancient, with fullness. I began to pray and fast and cry out to God for something to change.
Oh, I had prayed and fasted my entire life, but now I was getting really desperate. Between going through a lengthy and nasty divorce, a dysfunctional career that caused me to leave the military, and a general inner depression over not being sure of the truth, I was at my wits’ end.
I recalled the Scripture about Jesus and Peter:
And I tell you, you are Peter, and on this rock, I will build my church, and the powers of death shall not prevail against it. And I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven, and whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven (Matt 16:18-19).
This passage of Scripture resounded continually in my head. I knew Jesus didn’t lie — so why was there so much confusion, dissension, schisms, cults, and endless nonsense within Christianity? Why were there so many different gospels, so many heresies? My heart was full of questions, and I kept asking God, praying to Him to lead me to the ancient Church of the early Apostles. I knew it had to exist somewhere on this earth!
Could I make a pilgrimage to Greece to locate those original churches that the Apostle Paul had founded, to see if they were still there, to listen to what they were teaching and believing?
Would they still be there after 2,000 years? Ironically, I attended a Greek festival in Florida a few months after these musings (August 2015) and discovered the Greek Orthodox Church. I had never heard of it before and couldn’t believe that such a Church existed! I visited there, studying with them and reading the early Church Fathers. Their liturgy seemed so divine and beautiful — I was dazzled! It seemed like this was everything I was looking for, that I was finally home. But I wanted to be sure, so I took my time researching everything I could get my hands on about this ancient Church. I learned about the Great Schism as I attended their catechism class. Then, a few months later, I wanted to make a comparison between Orthodoxy and Catholicism, that other ancient Church. Although I had heard all of the reasons from the Orthodox side, I wanted to get the Catholic take on it all. So I began attending a nearby Catholic parish and reading about the Catholic Church. I enrolled in the Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults (RCIA) and read through the Catechism of the Catholic Church, more Fathers of the Church, and many other Catholic books. I also absorbed the Catholic articles, programs, and videos presented on the Coming Home Network, Symbolon, and EWTN. In reading Scott Hahn’s Rome Sweet Home, I was amazed that there were actually other Protestants, even ministers like me, who became Catholic. I devoured it all, studying, praying, and visiting both churches. I had friends in each that I would question, in addition to talking to the priests of both parishes. After a lengthy period of prayer and discernment, I decided that the Catholic Church was the one I was looking for.
I met with the priest and told him that I wanted to return home to the Church I was baptized in as a baby. I made my general confession and was received back into the Church during Holy Week 2016. I also received an annulment for my first marriage and eventually married a wonderful woman named Joan.
I registered at the parish and followed up by attending Mass every Sunday and occasionally during the week, as time permitted. I was in the midst of transitioning to a better job at the time, and shortly afterwards, the government employment again took most of my time, working long hours and strange shifts. I finally took a different job, but it was going to be out of state. I was sent back to Las Vegas in early 2017, where I finally was able to receive the Sacrament of Confirmation in May 2018. I’m attending a local parish in Las Vegas, but my work constantly takes me away, so I am not able to become as deeply involved in the parish as I would like. Being an ex-minister and pastor, it is disheartening to have to live with this division of my time and labor, but such is life. I have re-enlisted in the Air Force Reserve, and my civilian job is a classified position with the Department of Defense. I travel a lot, keeping me away from home and working strange schedules. I attend Mass in whatever place I find myself, pray the rosary, watch EWTN, and listen to Catholic radio, doing whatever I can to maintain contact with God and, in a quiet way, evangelize others.
Dealing with Doctrinal Differences
I think God used the Orthodox Church to pull me back home. I was so anti-Catholic, there was no way I ever would have set foot inside a Catholic church or have had any involvement with it. So it did take an open and loving third party influence to make it possible.
As for hurdles, of course, all of the major doctrines were originally problematic for me. Fortunately, because I had been learning these same doctrines on the Orthodox side, I was able to understand why the Catholic Church believes as it does.
For instance, as a Protestant, it seemed to me that Catholics were “worshipping Mary,” or at least placing too much emphasis on her. It felt like idolatry. For an Evangelical Protestant, it’s all about just you and Jesus, or you and the Holy Spirit, or you and God. But after studying Orthodox and Catholic doctrine and practice, I could finally see that Mary is merely venerated and honored as the mother of God — and that is something both beautiful and powerful and important for all Christians.
Another issue was the Real Presence of Christ in the Eucharist. I was Catholic as a child, but I was Protestant so long that this seemed a preposterous claim. However, as I studied the Fathers of the Church, I learned that the early Church really did believe in Christ’s Presence in the Eucharist, and that the Eucharist was central to their worship. Christians were even called “cannibals” by some pagans as a result. It definitely wasn’t a symbolic Prot- estant “communion,” but the actual Body and Blood of Christ! Again, I discovered that the early Church services were noth- ing like a modern Protestant service, but much more like today’s Catholic Mass.
Then there was the “praying to saints” issue. I quickly learned that this is not “prayer” as in worship of God. Instead, they were just asking them to pray for us, in the same way that we ask a loved one to pray for us. What better way to handle prayer than to ask the saints, who are in God’s presence in heaven, to pray for us? This is another thing that the Church did from the earliest time.
So many things that Catholics get blamed for are not even true! What they really believe and practice is stuff that has been around since the very beginning of Christianity. This is the Body of Christ that Jesus Himself established on earth, and I wanted to be part of it!
One of the things that I had disliked about Orthodoxy was its disorganization and lack of unity. They were like Protestants in that way. It was frustrating to try to learn and understand what they believe, because there was no organized program like the Catholic RCIA, no definitive doctrinal textbook like the Catechism of the Catholic Church. Not only that, but Orthodoxy was much too ethnic for me. At times, the Greek Orthodox Church felt more like a Greek social club than a Church. Then there is the fragmentation: Why so many different Orthodox Churches, each one functioning autonomously, separate from the others? There is no intercommunion, no commonality, even within a single national Church: one parish would say and do things one way, another parish would be completely different. Nobody is on the same page.
On the other hand, what I had once disliked about Catholicism, I was now beginning to love. I came to appreciate that there was a Pope, an overseer of the entire Church, to help provide overall structure and unity. I also began to understand the Mass, not only its beauty, but also its sensibility. I can now see that it is evangelistic, missionary, and universal. You can walk into any Latin Rite Catholic church and know exactly what is going on. You can feel at home there. Certainly, there are beautiful things about Orthodoxy — the liturgy and the architecture, for instance — but after all my research, the Catholic Church seems to be more like what Christ wanted the Church to be: universal yet evangelistic, ancient and traditional but relevant for today. And it has a global leader who ties it all together. That is exactly what I needed.
